Taco Bell

I admit it. I friggin love Taco Bell.

I know where to get a phenomenal tuna tartar. I'd rather my chocolate with a fine red wine and a touch of sea salt. I enjoy eating salads without dressing so I can get more of the flavors the vegetables have offer. I'm saying this because I want you to know, I do enjoy classy food.
But then....

Taco Bell is like the abusive boyfriend I can't get enough of. If an abusive boyfriend was capable of giving you sudden, and unnecessary, diarrhea.

 Every time I go back to it I rarely regret it. You know, whilst eating it. Of course 15 to 20 minutes later I wonder what the hell is wrong with me, but I go back anyway.

I will order way too much. As in a quesadilla meal plus burritos, plus chalupas, plus supreme tacos. I can't get enough! I have ordered so much a few times I've taken to having fake conversations on my phone as I pick up the food.

"What's that? Yeah I'm like ten minutes away." I put my hand over the phone, lean toward the cashier as I whisper, "Extra hot sauce please," uncovering the phone I go back to my fake conversation, "Yeah I asked just like you wanted. It's fine! I'll be there soon!"

I'm 90% sure the cashier never buys this ploy, but I do it anyway.

Did you know you can buy gift cards to Taco Bell? Yes. Gift. Cards. It's like a Starbucks gift card, but

instead of an overpriced simple black coffee, you're getting Crunch Wrap Supremes, Grilled Stuffed Burritos, and Doritos Locos Tacos!

I have dined at very fancy places. I really enjoy culinary detail and when someone is passionate about food.
I also love things covered in cheese.
I'm American, what can I say?

But I will not, I repeat, WILL NOT attempt to eat their breakfast abomination. I don't know what the hell is going on there. I love Taco Bell, but I have my limits.