How it Went

So recently I performed at the Comedy Store.

Recently as in Monday night. It all started when a coworker told me about a Craig's list ad seeking new comics for the Store. Weird I know, but my coworker threatened me with the prospect of working at Starbucks for the rest of my life... so I got the courage and emailed my response (amazing how shy you can be over an email). I was contacted pretty soon after and instead of having me audition for the show they just put me on the bill...

 There was some confusion in the beginning about when the show started. (silly us thought that when they tell you a show starts at 8.. the show would actually start at 8) So around 8:20 we were finally let into the building, and I was directed to the back stage where I had so often waited with that old improv group mere months before. It still carried that faint aroma of pot and Lord knows what else. (It is however a lot nicer than some other comedy clubs, I have to admit)

I was greeted by the host who then gave me the details of how the show would be run. (I actually came to find out that one of the reasons they picked me to perform that night was because they thought I had done stand up there before, or ever for that matter. Even though I clearly told them "When it says I performed at the Comedy Store on my resume it was when I was performing improv, not stand up." But seeing as these people are really on top of their details I didn't stress myself over correcting them when they told me"You don't need to worry! You've done this before right?")

So I was told that the more people I bring the better spot I would get and the longer amount of time I would be allotted on stage. Luckily I about 12 wonderfully supportive friends showed up. The roomies were present of course and fortunate were hit on by the ever popular emcee (wink wink nudge nudge sarcasm.) Some guest appearances came up that night, one of them being Elliot Chang who if you haven't seen, is hilarious. (check him out)

When I was finally given the set list, around the time when three comics had already done their sets, I found out that I was number ten. There were quite a few comics and the ones who were more well known were allowed about ten to fifteen minutes. When I first received the details I was told I would get eight minutes, then I got a follow up phone call which entailed seven minutes, and as I sat backstage the emcee explained I may be getting about 6 minutes before they "flashed the lights" So all in all, I had no clue how long I'd have.

Fast forward about two and a half hours of waiting around listening to an onslaught of penile jokes, one complete with a live strap-on, (I never said I was proud of the people working around me) I was about to go on. The kid that went before me shared a lot of similar comments I had been making in my head about some of the comics on stage. He'd say out loud "Oh that's not funny," or "Yeah that's inappropriate." So I had faith that the kid going up before me would be a good act to follow. As I was waiting off stage I listened to him ramble about religion and how awful Christianity was, trying desperately to be that edgy comic but instead ended  spiraling into a hopeless mess and wound up forgetting half his set. Worrying that I would do the same thing I muttered a feverish prayer (one of many I sent up that day) into my clenched hands asking that I would not forget my line up and that the crowd would be gracious.
When the emcee announced me I was slightly broadsided by his comments. The point of the emcee is to talk up the next comic, get the crowd excited for them and then bring them out. Every once in a while they'll throw in a cute quip about who the comic is and where they've performed. I didn't know this guy and let me be clear that he was very polite back stage, and was in no way offensive...off stage.

But as I waited this was the gem I was introduced with:

"This next comic comes from Phoenix Arizona and I gotta say she's pretty hot. I would totally bang her if you know what I mean, which I think you do. You guys up here in the front her friends? Think you could hook me up? Haha Alright give it up for her she's performed all over town KAAATTTIIIEEEE E!!!"

Confused I walked on stage thinking "jerk" and continued with my set which started a little something like this...
"Wow, that was awkward. Think I should tell him I'm celibate? Ooops. No but really I'm celibate, that's not a joke. Shut up."
 
And off I went. Perhaps swinging through the motions of my planned out set, but nonetheless remembering it all. Which is quite an accomplishment... apparently...
I know there are plenty of things I can improve upon but for only doing this for the second official time, I think it went pretty dang well.
 
Cheerfully yours,
~Goof